Welcome to the 5th installment of
Wee-Bit Wednesday!
Today is the beginning tidbit from Chapter 13. This is a dream (hence the use of italics to differentiate it from the rest of the chapter) that Angelica is having, which she discovers a little later is actually more of a telepathic communication than a dream. Jenni is one of her leukemia patients at the hospital, and the one she feels most bonded with by far.
As always, honest feedback is appreciated!
As always, honest feedback is appreciated!
**************************************
Angelica walked through a summer field of lush green grass that brushed against the fabric at her knees. She looked down at her blue hospital scrubs and white doctor’s coat. That was strange, she thought. Why would she be dressed for work while taking a leisurely stroll through a field?
The tinkling laughter of a child danced faintly in the breeze past her ears. She turned in a slow circle, but tall blades of grass sprinkled with wildflowers swaying gently on their thin stalks were the only ones that greeted her.
Just then the sun’s rays seemed to intensify, distracting her easily from her search. She closed her eyes, lifted her face to the azure sky and drank in its warmth as it spilled onto her skin. The delicate scents of the utopian flora swept through her body, leaving her more relaxed with every breath she took. Angelica could not remember a time when she had been more at peace.
Again she heard the peels of delight like an echo in the sky. Then a tiny voice called from behind her.
“Hello, Dr. Hart!”
Angelica spun around to see her favorite patient skipping waist deep in the tall emerald blades, wearing a beautiful yellow sun dress. Her golden brown curls danced around her face, her form had filled out with a healthy dose of baby fat and her amber eyes twinkled with the cherubic mischief of a happy child.
“Jenni!” she gasped in disbelief. “What happened to you? What’s going on?”
Jenni giggled as she gave Angelica’s hips a fierce hug. “I knew you would come. He told me that you might not, but I knew you would. You always come when I need you. And now here you are!” she exclaimed in an innocent matter-of-fact manner.
Angelica knelt down in front of the little girl and lightly held her shoulders. “Where is here, Jenni? I don’t understand.”
She smiled a baby-toothed grin that pushed her chubby cheeks up higher onto her face. “This is where I come when I sleep. Isn’t it pretty? Look, Dr. Hart, I’m not sick here.”
“No, sweetie, you’re not. You’re absolutely beautiful,” she agreed with a beaming smile, lifting a hand to finger some of her curls. “Jenni, who told you that I might not come?”
“The nice man that’s been talking to me today. I think he’s like your friend. I like him a lot, but he doesn’t talk to me very much. Not like you, Dr. Hart. You come talk to me even when you don’t have to. And I like that very, very much.”
Water rippled over the child’s eyes and spilled onto her cheeks, framing the smile that refused to diminish in this place of tranquility for Jenni.
Angelica swiftly pulled her into a loving embrace. This child had touched her in more ways than she would ever know. She didn’t understand why Jenni was meant to suffer so much in her short little life and sometimes it infuriated Angelica’s Mortal half, even as her Angelic half accepted He had a reason for everything.
“I’ll always be here for you, Jenni. I swear it to you.”
Jenni pulled away slightly to look into Angelica’s eyes. With a small smile that threatened to falter she pleaded softly, “Then wake up, Dr. Hart. I need you. Wake up…”
*****************************
And there you have it. That segues into Dominic gently waking her up with the same verbal encouragement. She wakes up slightly discombobulated and then feels at a loss on how to act in the “awkward morning after” situation, not to mention she’s appalled that he’s there before she can correct her morning breath and shove a comb through her hair. It’s a super cute scene between them. One I really enjoyed writing. :)
Just as a small update about my WIP, I'm currently revising Chapter 14 out of 30. That's almost the half way point!!! I had hoped to be done with my revisions by the end of July, but it looks like I might be on track to finish sooner than that. I hope, I hope, I hope! I'm SO eager to get this puppy in the hands of my Betas.
Anyhoo – I know I may be letting you all down with this next announcement, but I’ve become a victim of my own success, so to speak. My FAN-tastic Fridays have gotten pretty popular and somehow I’ve managed to entertain all of you while promoting some of the greatest people in my blogosphere. Unfortunately, in an attempt to keep them fresh and individually tailored for each of my guests, they take a significant amount of time to put together.
I know I promised you an interview with the amazing and fabu, Shannon Whitney Messenger, but I’m pushing it back a week. She’ll be here next Friday, June 18th – I swear! And then, moving forward, I’ll be doing my FAN-tastic Fridays every other week to ensure each of my guests gets my utmost attention.
I can’t tell you how much I love that you all stop by my little ol' blog. And reading your comments make my day more than you can imagine. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Have a great rest of the week!
Nice dream sequence. Sweet.
ReplyDeleteAnd no worries about Fan-tastic Friday. We know how crazy busy life can get. Just as long as you keep doing it. Happy Wednesday.
It was a very nice dream snippet! I love your descriptions, something that I find trouble with and you do it without hesitation it seems!
ReplyDeleteWell I'm excited about this Friday nonetheless, looks like you are at least replacing it with something equally as good!
Gina - Your writing is great, girl. The description is really beautiful and plunks me right into the scene.
ReplyDeleteThere was only one line that threw me for a loop.
"She turned in a slow circle, but tall blades of grass sprinkled with wildflowers swaying gently on their thin stalks were the only ones that greeted her."
This context of this sentence seems a bit off to me. The only ones? What are the ones? She hears laughter but stalks of grass are the ones that greet her? It's a lovely sentence that I think only needs a minor change. Perhaps:
"She turned in a slow circle, but ONLY tall blades of grass sprinkled with wildflowers swaying gently on their thin stalks [strike]were the only ones that[/strike] greeted her."
Just a suggestion.
Keep up the great work! And don't sweat the Fridays. Your interviews are awesome. We can be patient. Maybe. ;)
Jenni with an I! You have no idea how hard I struggled when I was younger to get people to spell my name Jenni with an I. People always wanted to put a Y and there is no Y in Jennifer! Which is why, when I went to college, I started going by Jennifer or Jen. Thank you for promoting the *correct* spelling of Jenni. :D
ReplyDeleteI also thought the use of "ones", as Michelle noted, was a little odd. It was the only jarring bit in an otherwise lovely scene.
Piedmont: Thank you! And I promise to keep up the interviews. ;) I'm glad you enjoy them so much.
ReplyDeleteJen: You are always so sweet with your comments! I'm not sure what you think I'm replacing the interview with this Friday though. I didn't mean to be unclear, but I'm actually taking this Friday off from posting anything. :( I hope you're not too disappointed.
Michelle & Jenni: You are SO right about that sentence. I had changed that section several times last night while listening to my husband wrestle around with the kids while I was trying to work. I'm shocked any of my edits made sense! *lol* I knew it read awkward, but my brain wouldn't cooperate. Thanks for helping me out. Your suggestion, Michelle, is so much clearer!
Jenni: I know, how weird is it that she named herself Jenni with an "i"? It's definitely a very cool quinky-dink and I'm glad it makes you happy. She's an adorable little girl, too. :)
**Word Verification of the Day:
sumbum
As in: Wow! He's playing the harmonica while washing my windshield and singing "Oh, Susanna". That's sumbum!
Intriguing! Usually I don't like dream sequences that much, but in this instance I think it would add something to the story. I'm not sure what makes it different, probably because it's more of a communication rather than a foreshadowing. Hmmm. Who knows. I also struggled over the same sentence, so I'm glad you changed it. It was the only part that took me out of the story though.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Tiana! I find it really interesting that you were okay with this dream sequence when normally you're turned off by them. I think I might feel the same way as you, generally speaking, but the two instances I use dreams in my book are key elements and are actual communications, rather than the dreams they appear to be. :)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I think that's going to be the theme of the day today: that sentence was WAY wrong. *lol* :) But I'm happy it's the only thing throwing people off so far!
Love the dream sequence. And really, if you need to push my interview back another week, no worries. Really. *is shy* *blushes* :)
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear your revisions are going on schedule! That's a huge accomplishment!
WHAT! No FANtastic Friday this week!! I want to speak to the manager of this joint! I laid out my whole weekly schedule around that! GEEZ!!!!!!
ReplyDelete:)
Oh...btw...I enjoyed the dream sequence. Great ending!
Ohhhh...vampires and celestial beings. Nice! Sounds romantic and exciting. Great blurb!
ReplyDeleteGood reading your post
ReplyDelete